As a human pup, you place control of what is happening to you into your masters hands. Your owner can do anything he wants to you, he gets everything his way, and enjoys great power over you.
This statement above is certainly not true of all human pups, nor is it some kind of expected standard of behaviour for a pup and owner. Some people think it is true though, and it is a good place to begin so we can explain boundaries for pup play. We won’t be covering what a master should be doing, only what you should be doing pup. It is your responsibility to look after you.
Some owners and trainers do like to feel powerful and in total control of a pup. Even free and easy masters can still be self indulgent and rationalise away their taking total control of a pup, often imagining “I am just doing what the pup wants”. And then there are masters who are seriously insecure inside, and the control of a pup gives them a sense of power and self worth. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter what the reasoning, a pup owner shouldn’t have total control over a pup. There should always be a boundary set, defining what you as a pup will and won’t tolerate. You both have to be sensible adults first, fuck buddies and bdsm playmates second. Repeating above, it is your responsibility to look after you.
Setting the boundary
Of course, no master likes to give up power, so you can expect resistance pup when you try and set up boundaries. Don’t be surprised and shocked, in fact try and anticipate, without anxiety, your master not being accustomed to being given a limit. If keep calm and avoid anxious thinking and nerves, you can cope as you define what is and what isn’t good for you.
So let this it be understood pup – always expect resistance from your master when you put up a personal boundary. Once you have made that step, things can often be tense and seem worse before they get better. Trust will build and things will settle down as you both reassure one another within the new boundaries.
Rarely is what you wanted instantly given with ease. It takes time for you and your master to adjust to a new boundary. It’s very necessary to be patient and tolerant, but don’t back down pup. Once you have set that boundary, you have to be prepared to keep to the rules. So only set boundaries, make limits, that you are willing to defend and keep to. You have to sincerely believe in your imposed rule pup.
Don’t try and set a lot of boundaries and impose a lot of rules all at once pup. Especially if you are in a pack. Especially in a moment of emotional tension. You assert yourself best by doing boundary setting methodically pup, starting with the most important boundary you desire, and then you explain what you want and expect in a calm moment alone with your master. Gradually you can include more people as you feel confident, and also set more limits.
You should decide for yourself pup what is best for you. Your caring master will no doubt have good advice, but the choice of what you will or will not do is always yours.